Random Writing

waterproof

cling wrap around my skin.

stay dry –

even blood runs like water here.

 

cling wrap, like i’m preserving this body

flesh to be kept fresh

for another day when it’s ready, just

not today

 

cling wrap must be the reason his touch no longer electrifies

the reason i can put myself face to face with the source of warm, sticky honey

endless flowing river of love

and not feel the need to push my tongue through it

no want

no need to taste

 

cling wrap, to stay dry

 

i want to explain

that lesbian and bisexual do not fit this body anymore

afterall, it is just a body

that wants what it wants

loves who it loves

namelessly.

 

i know, i must be confusing them

but i’m not feeling confused.

i just want to know why tears still come, at the thought of sharing this body.

in a moment’s embrace, has the layer been peeled off

do i feel, again? can i ever

feel, again?

 

even if it’s just a cut of meat:

forearm, exposed from under covers,

where the hairs still remain after all this time

though no longer shivering like geese without feathers;

thigh, where it’s the smoothest, milkiest

most succulent and inviting;

breast, where brassiere wraps like a bowtie on a birthday present, and

clings to

skin

 

and if i invite this other body to join with mine

will it care enough to listen to the nuances

to the way my drawers creak as they close

would he pause

 

or would he stutter away the moments with ragged breaths

mind blank, pulse racing, eager to spray paint this building

call it vandalism

call it art

 

cling wrap,

may i shed my sin the way

the snake sheds its skin

 

i crave only to be known.

this dishonesty must be an unintended side-effect of my condition

i have no words to explain myself

only that, if you listen and somehow learn the tune that makes my heart dance

sing it back to me

since i’ve long forgotten

sing it back to me.

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